Unromantic Fred

Before I start this, I must let you know that I am an African male, very much attuned to his traditions, and for this I have no apologies. My assertion today is that no matter what people say, I am romantic.

I have been accused severally over the years of being hopelessly unromantic. Mostly by people who are not opportune to know me at that level. I won’t say it is their fault because I am a very private person, who though talkative around people he knows, is very shy around strangers. So people tend to get their impressions of me from what they hear me say, which might be very little, much or nothing at all, depending on who I am talking to.

Like I have said before I am a romantic, I just do not ascribe to those seemingly universal notions of romance; flowers, candle light dinners, teary movies, kneeling before her to propose and what not. No, I am not suggesting there is anything wrong with the overtly dramatic impulses that movies have made us believe is romantic nature. Na, I just feel that those of us that ascribe to the African notions of romance (which is not old, mind you, especially if you agree that the flower culture is much more than five centuries old) that best suites our environment and temperament.

I love eating at home and I love my woman’s cooking, I love what she does with bitterleaf and cocoyam and I rather sit across her eating her food than in a cold (they all are) eatery munching expensive pastries and over cooked chickens prepared by who knows who (or what). Call me old school if you like, but I didn’t buy a ring when I proposed, neither did I get to go on my knees to do it. It just happened; I didn’t plan to do it that day, even though it had been on my mind for months. I just finished eating her special egusi and semovita and though ‘what the heck’ this babe has been too good to me and I suddenly couldn’t bear the thought of not being with her forever.

What I am saying in a nutshell is this, if anyone thinks I am not romantic because my nature prefers me spending ‘secluded’ time with my woman and not exaggerating my affection just for people to see the love I know I feel deeply, then that person is obviously blind to what romance is.